The Strength for Grace

I think I actually thought that having my own business would let me operate among the world of The Economy without the constant, drowning weight of bosses restricting and constricting my creation and expression in pursuing the business needs. But there is no getting out from under the heavy, dated, highly overweighted, bureaucratic officiousosity that is How We Get Along. We've got a code for everything and someone to complain when one toe goes over the line for even a minute, and someone else, paid by me, to enforce. No slack. Zero risk. Zero joy. Zero fun. 100% stress, for the code-breaker, the complainer and the enforcer. Completely Unfriendly.

Why is this deemed the best way to go? Why is this how the entire world demands we behave together in activities of The Economy? And since The Economy has somehow become the only engine of Society that matters, it's no wonder we all feel like we have no choices. We actually don't. All that stuff they say about it being a frame of mind is just pablum to keep us docile and believing that the way things are is the only way they can be and we should accept our place in it.

I'm tired from always being the one to listen openly, when I am not listened to openly. I'm tired from the unrelenting hammer hitting the nail into my head that the rules are the rules are the rules and I am not the one in charge, anyway. I grow weary of smiling and being friendly in the face of not-so-passive hostility. I find myself balking, this time. I find myself wanting to push back, hard. All the while knowing that I must not, should not, can not give myself that much slack.

But when emotions hit wrong at just the wrong moment, will I have the strength for grace?

20 Signs Group Process Conversation Could Help

When we have a project to accomplish as a team, and we know how to do it, the most efficient thing is to just do it. Each of us knows what needs to be done and what our role is. We can meet, agree, and get to the work. Periodic checkins allow us to keep track of movement. We understand the scope and nature of the problem, can identify the solution steps to take, and we use adequate communication to keep our parts aligned. When we know how to do what we are tasked to do, group process can feel like a hindrance, a time-suck, pointless. No wonder some jaded executives hope they will never see another sticky note in their lives!

But here's the secret. Group process is not just about getting the project done (though we will still get the project done!).

Group process is about processing something not entirely known, as a group, through conversation. It brings the most value when it matters that the group arrives at outcomes together, for any number of different reasons. It's a chance to delve into the messy, face the overwhelming, and speak directly to the elephant in the room (once you realize it's an elephant and not a tree trunk or a snake).

Why not try this little quiz of 20 questions to see if group process conversation might help with what matters to you?

Group Process Conversation Quiz
Score 1 point for each time you "agree" with the statements below: 

1)   We don't know all the steps to meet the goal
2)   There is a lot of data housed in people's minds that we want to capture and use
3)   We aren't entirely sure what information we have or need to make the decision
4)   Team members could communicate more, and better, with each other in daily work
5)   Team members could communicate more, and better, with other teams
6)   People often seem bored, frustrated, apathetic or rigid
7)   Multiple stakeholders have different perspectives on the outcomes
8)   We haven't been able to get to the root of the problem through meetings
9)   Trust is lacking, which leads to communication issues
10) The leaders and those who execute the plans disagree on timelines
11) Handoffs are unclear, or cause delays or issues
12) Processes have evolved in ways that waste time, effort and resources
13) We worry that our daily execution might be deviating from the original vision
14) We don't have a clear vision
15) We haven't prioritized our strategic goals and values so everyone understands
16) Our processes don't seem to be supporting our vision and values
17) We keep trying to do Agile planning, but we live in a Waterfall world
18) Our product ideas are lackluster
19) Our meetings are boring and leave people drained
20) We'd like to sometimes have a little fun together while we work on important things

Score Yourself:

If you scored 0
Congratulations! Your organization is running optimally. Group process may enhance relationships and trust, but is unlikely to improve your effectiveness. Or maybe you're already doing it, in your own way!

If you scored 1-3
A single session might be enough to tackle something important and lay the groundwork for continued future success.  Engaging a series of group conversations over time will enhance your effectiveness and make sure nothing gets swept under the carpet to bite you later.

If you scored 3-10
You could benefit from a series of group process conversations over time, planned and designed to address the specific areas you identified and support a culture of creativity and communication.

If you scored 10+
Engaging in an inter-related series of group processes, over time, can help your organization overcome the systemic issues underlying the symptoms you are seeing, and support your teams in more creative, communicative culture.

"Group Process, "Design Thinking" and other fancy terms mask the fact that there are lots of ways to get together, consistently over time, to focus on specific areas. There are also many handy tools for framing, analyzing, prioritizing and making sense of information.  You don't need a fancy place or facilitators to do group process well, but it helps to have someone to walk beside you on the journey, who keeps aware of the possibilities and helps your team get comfortable and select approaches. It starts with a simple conversation about what keeps you up at night. What nags (or plagues) your organization? Let's talk.